Fashion ain't my thing

by DowntownKate

Lori Braun is about to go to the Arnold. The fun or the hell of an event like this is planing what to wear.

(Here Lori secretly hopes she will find something to wear in her very own closet. Did not happen, off to the shops she goes)

From the start Lori had a vision. "I'd like to wear a belted shirt with one sleeve to show off my right bicep." 

"That is so sexy pirate!" said Kate all ready to hack off a sleeve.

A real pirate would have the know how to pillage and rape until the end goal was achieved. These girls proved to be unlike pirates and more like mermaids who just drifted around the sea waiting for something interesting to wash up. Nothing did. And in an act of desperation Lori grabbed a hold of two basic black pants that needed serious hemming. No hemming and hawing for these femalemuscle.com girls who hefted the light bag and headed straight for the tailors.

"I've been coming here for fifteen years." Lori told Kate as the neared the storefront MARIA'S ALTERATIONS.
Inside the square room lined with clothing racks there were three ladies sitting in front of vintage singer sewing machines.

(Notice Lori's Neil Young shirt in this photo. Considering wearing it.)

Lori greeted the proprietress, "You look very good."
Maria looked like a plump grey velvet pin cushion who might have the ability to order a muscle girl about. She did. She told Lori to stand here. Put your foot up here. Turn around. No, it's not too short. No, it's not to long. No, it's not to wide. Anything goes nowadays.
In my day it was different..

Lori and Kate left MARIA'S feeling rough loved and reassured. They didn't give it a second thought that they were taking fashion advise from a old school women wearing a polyester pantsuit and a tufted gray hairdo.