For my Friend Bob Bonham and his DAD
Friday, January 19, 2007 at 16:21 One of my heroes in the bodybuilding world is Bob Bonham, owner of Strong & Shapely Gym, one of the largest and best bodybuilding gyms in the country. Bob has been a leading man in the bodybuilding world for over 20 years, and has helped me in every way possible make my mark there.
Robert Bonham, a World War II veteran and Bob's dad, passed away on January 15th here in New Jersey. He was 89 years old.
Last night I attended a memorial service for him. Many of our friends from bodybuilding came to pay their respects. I enjoyed talking with Bill Jentz, founder of the leading publication Women's Physique World, and Greg Valentino, famous as the bodybuilder with the world's biggest biceps.
The service was simple. Bob's dad had been cremated, and amazing old photographs detailing Robert's Bonham's life from the military through the 1950's and up to the present (Bob pulled one out of his pocket of his then 70 year old dad with Shelley Beattie in the 1980's) set a wonderful tone for the evening.
At 9:00 p.m., a compassionate priest gave us a brief sermon. He reminded us of Robert Bonham's wish, published in his obituary in the local newspaper, to make an unusual donation in honor of his life. Instead of a monetary gift to charity, Mr. Bonham requested that we all "do an act of kindness." The priest showed us how we could satisfy this profound and moving request and his sermon touched my heart and those around me.
At 9:10 p.m., two young soldiers (no more than 20 years old, for sure), quietly marched to the front of the room bearing a folded Amerian flag. Over the course of the next 15 minutes, with "Taps" playing in the background, they unfolded and folded the flag and finally presented it as a gift from the United States Government to the Bonhams.
[Played slowly and expressively, it has a tender, touching, mournful character, in keeping with the fact that it is sounded not only for 'lights out,' but also over the soldier's grave, be he general or private, so that as with 'lights out' night closes in upon the soldier's day, so with the same call the curtain rolls down upon his life.]
Robert's Bonham's wish is an easy one. What it means to me is treat people as you want to be treated. A friend, a family member or a stranger in need, give compassion. As the priest tried to explain, we are all part of each other, what is done to or for one of us is done to or for all of us. It matters not to which God you pray or which house of God you attend.
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