Walmart, Target and Cabbage Patch faces
Friday, December 22, 2006 at 01:53 
A bunch of drunk Santas sneek up behind me. I got scared, but after the photo was taken. Still shopping in Manhattan for something very special. I have no idea of what it is. Then I am off to South Florida by The "Bagel Shuttle", my favorite air travel route these days. I have minutes to pack because as I tried to book my ticket to Fort Lauderdale airport, the air fares were going up the second. One more day and the price could sore way over $1,000 dollars one way. I threw my junk and some presents into a very large suitcase and drove to Newark Airport. The plane was late as usual. I would be upset if it were not late because it would mess up my routine. I thrive on routine.
My suitcase was overweight. I only had one suitcase. I had to pay an extra $20 dollars. Next time I will bring two suitcases Instead and pack even more. This way I will not have to pay the fine for the one extra heavy bag. Makes perfect sense to me. Not really.
Got to Fort Lauderdale airport at about 1:30 in the morning. Tired and stressed from sitting next to four cabbage patch faced infants, all having the puffiest cheeks I have ever seen. They were nice except for the little baby girl who kept kicking me and would not allow me to go to the bathroom ,not once. If I did, I would wake her and most of the sleeping passengers I am sure would have given me the finger. The strangest thing was that when she was awake, she just stared at me. I felt most uncomfortable having a 5 month old cross examining me, so I made extra, extra sure not to wake her up. Deplaned first, I was seat 2F great...until they tell us our luggage is going to be held up for quite a while. Shuffling a large group of tired adults and kids (who looked like they all decided to fly in Pajamas) from one carousel to another.
I just want to get home. Very humid and my hair immediately frizzes. I don't care. I used to care about that sort of thing. Who knows, maybe frizzy hair is in this winter, I secretly pray each night. I go to LA Fitness the next day with my brother Bruce who parks his Corvette outside my house for quite a long time before coming inside to say hi and when he finally does, he quickly rips off his shirt to show me his abs. Everyone does that to me. Not just my brother. I feel like Betty Crocker of buff bodies. Lori Crocker. I like the sound. Had a great workout. Today I trained back and triceps. Everyone was nice to me.
It felt like I landed on some other planet. This could not be South Florida, could it? Smiling Floridians all over the place. Smiling at me and one guy even asked if it were OK if he worked in and when he did, he changed the weights back to what I was using. The good old days of polite gym etiquette. I do miss it. Maybe I should teach a class on it.
Some kid with skinny calves called me a "mam". That made me feel sort of old, but then I looked at him and realized he was just a polite 17 year old boy. Good workout, good crowd and guess where I am off to? You got it. Florida's best store for the masses, Target. AHHHHHHHHH. Bruce lost in one of the the toy isles. I told him to start selling his toys on Ebay and he is, he says. One robot is being sold this month or something like that he mumbles. He has an entire garage full of robots and other strange Tokyo toys that look so strange to me. I would have preferred to be at Walmart so I could find those Snoopy Christmas pajamas that I waited all year to buy. Walmart is a much better store as I have discovered. It's all so odd to me. I people watch at these stores for hours. It's like nothing I have ever seen before. Without meaning to sound snobish: From New York City, transported to Walmart has an impact on me (all New Yorkers) even if we are not aware of it. Talk about a a total 360. I finally buy an Alan Jackson CD. My new obsession with "new" country music and some Excedrin for my pounding head. Bruce puts the toys down at the counter when he sees I am staring at him hard. I embarrassed him into buying the flashlight instead. What are sisters for?
Reader Comments (3)
Please greet your father from me, Anders Wikström, he´ll know.
Br/Anders
I told my father that you said hello and I gave him your email. He is on his way to Germany for the holidays with Maria.
Have a wonderful holiday season!
Lori
Anders